Suckas.

I’d say it’s time for another round of the ASS game! Though in this case, I suspect this might not be such a gross misrepresentation of facts as it normally is.

Here is the specimen for the Ass game:


B: Oh Angie, look at us!
A: *guffaws* I KNOW!
B: Could we be any hotter?!
A: I think not!
B: Do you see this food we’re supposed to eat? Who cooked this?! Where did this food come from? It looks like bird vomit!
A: I don’t care. I don’t eat food. It’s not good for my body. Food makes you have to go poo and I can’t afford to lose any ounces of weight from my frail, breakable frame. Though my shit smells like roses and that’s a gift for everyone.
B: Well, perhaps you can have my two fries. But then again, that is the only recognizable food on my plate…..
A: If you give them to me, when we get home to our shamefully sized plantation (complete with our multicultural slaves and nannies), I’ll do that thing in the bedroom that you like….. *winks*
B: REALLY?! Promise?!
A: Yup, I’ll even do it twice.
B: Er….. we are talking about that thing where we take private pictures of our mockery of a life and sell them to tabloids right?
A: OF COURSE! Would I ever refer to anything else?
B: GREAT! YES! TAKE THE FUCKING FRIES!
A: *takes a bite* Shit. I’ve got a stomach ache from not eating for 295 days. Where are those damn laxatives?!
B: Hey Ang, there are photographers around. Remember to smile!
A: *beams* It’s too bad we couldn’t bring our children tonight. We always bring them to other inappropriate places!
B: Yeah well… the kids have been working hard and even they deserve to take a break. It’s written into their contract or something.
A: Isn’t it funny how many people buy this?! They love us!
*A and B genuinely laugh and smile*
B: Oh, that just put a million dollars in my pocket. I’ll “pretend” to give it to our imaginary charity and use the money to buy Dubai or something.
A: Oh Brad, I love it when you talk like that.
B: Remember to smile Ang, everyone is eating this shit up.
A: Fucking suckers.