Your blog keeps getting better and better! Your older articles are not as good as newer ones you have a lot more creativity and originality now keep it up!
First off: hello there! You're looking lovely. Second off, my older articles are not as good as my newer ones? Well, I dunno about that one. My genius is timeless really. I will admit however, that the more recent old posts are Nos-Chin posts, and unless you know who Nos-Chin is, the wit is lost on you. I do think it took a lot of creativity and originality to invent Nos-Chin, but I can concede that perhaps my newer posts may be more universally appreciated and understood. I'm like a fine wine that way, I get better with age.
However, this leads me to my next point. I tend to write only when I find something worth snarking about. But considering that I live in this little Canadian bubble, and I really am only one woman (despite the fact that I have the ego of an entire harem), there are limits to my abilities to find blog content. But there are no limits to my snark. It's like I'm all dressed up in snark with no place to go. So I welcome suggestions and recommendations. If you have something you'd like me to touch upon, or want some wonderfully sarcastic advice, I urge you to e-mail me:
missnihilist@gmail.com
E-mails to tell me to "GET BENT!" are also appreciated because as we've seen, Miss Nihilist is never hotter than when she's insulting people. However, sentiments such as "sad", "pathetic", "evil", and "jealous" have already been covered. Buy a thesuraus if you need better insults. For example, anybody out there find me abhorrent?! Anyone? Give me some real meat to chew on.
I'm also trying something new on this blog. It's called "The JUMP!". No, it's some viral STD, it's some fancy shmancy technology that's existed since... I dunno... maybe 2007. Ah, fuck off, it's new to me. But it means, you now have to click through in order to continue reading. That way, my blog posts don't seem to be the length of the dictionary. So follow the jump (that means click on the link below, you fruitcake) to read more:
I have, however, decided to retire Nos-Chin. I love ya buddy but you just aren't getting the creative juices flowing the way you used to. It's not you, it's me, and we'll share custody of the husband okay?
I've recently decided to try a new healthy eating routine. It consists of smaller portions, healthier food, and some exercise. Now it may or may not be motivated by the weight gain (brought on perhaps by the "hiding behind the glow of the computer screen") or the fact that my pants fit me like sausage casings, but I have to make this perfectly clear:
IT IS DEEPLY UNSATISFYING.
Eating healthy is for the birds. Oh yay, when I live an extra ten years, I guarantee you that I'll be thinking about all the rice cakes that led me to those 10 years. Abso-freaking-lutely. I've heard that when you exercise hard, you get something called endorphins which supposedly make you happy. Endorphins? Happy? WHAT? What are these endorphins you speak of? I seem to lack the endorphin-gland because happy is not me after I work out.
Also, the byproduct of all this great healthy living is that I'm crabbier than usual. And I'm pretty fucking crabby already. So in addition to living 10 years longer, I'll be alone because I've scared off everyone that is silly enough to love me. So it'll be me, my healthy body, and a dozen of my favourite cats. Me-crazy-ow.
But, I'm glad to report that in this day and age, it appears that society is growing more understanding and appreciative of bodies of various sizes. Nothing has been more apparent than V Magazine's upcoming plus-size issue. Three cheers for V Magazine! And another cheer for good measure for daring to address a very pertinent, but underacknowledged, issue in both fashion and society. Women come in all shapes and sizes. That is a fact and a reality. I know that reality shows like the Bachelor and Flava Flav's dating show make people think that the world is full of bimbo ditzes whose waist size is higher than their IQ, but women do come in all shapes and sizes. The same fact is applicable to men, but given that the issue of overweight men is not taboo like bigger women is, that's an entirely different issue of double standards that I won't even attempt to touch upon today.
It's like we're chairs. Chairs can come in little itty bitty tall chairs that only exclamation marks can sit on, or they can be fairly large sectionals that can accomodate anybody. Is the itty bitty chair better than the sectional? I dunno, it depends on whether I've had turkey or not. It's personal preference. Chairs are chairs and none are better than another. Now if you follow my faulty analogy (women=chairs), then skinny women are no better than bigger women, and bigger women are no better than skinny women. We're all chairs in the end.
Now that I've taken my stupid chair analogy and roamed off into the lost realm of doesn't-make-sense-and-i-ramble-like-i-am-on-opium-land, let's return back to V magazine. They did a One Size Fits All spread where a typical "skinny" model modeling an outfit is compared to a "plus-size" model wearing the same outfit. And it's a picture by picture comparison with barely discernable differences. See for yourself below:
The plus-size model is a few inches bigger than her skinny counterpart but still looks dynamite, don't you think? I think she looks awesome. The reason why I keep writing "plus-size" is because I think the width of her waist is the same width of one of my fingers (which does WONDERS for my self-esteem I assure you), but it's still a great step in revising the public's perception of beauty and body image. Because our misconception of body image, where being bigger than a size 4 is something to be ashamed about, needs a major and massive overhaul.
So I'll leave you with the words of Gabourey Sidibe, my new girl crush (and if I play my cards right: my entirely fictional new best friend). Because if more magazines like V ran articles like the One Size Fits All 40 or 50 years ago, and more actresses like Gabourey Sidibe were upfront and vocal about being proud of their body image, perhaps we wouldn't live in such a body-obsessed society now. But it's never too late to change.
“They try to paint the picture that I was this downtrodden, ugly girl who was unpopular in school and in life, and then I got this role and now I’m awesome,” says the actress. “But the truth is that I’ve been awesome, and then I got this role.”
1 comment:
I think the new technology you added was great cause now we get even more Miss Nihilist. And I definately with all the snark all the time.
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