2009!

So it’s me. I realize that I’ve allowed Nos-Chin to overwhelm my blog lately with his self-deprecating, self-pitying, and delusional rants. He’s had a rough few months but enough is enough, eh?! Nos-Chin: STOP COMPLAINING. NO ONE CARES.

I apologize for that.

This is my first blog post of 2009. WOW! 2009, who would have thunk! Y2K feels like it was just a few years ago. I bet all those stores and restaurants that capitalized on the Y2K phenomenon feel kind of dumbass-ish now. Who is going to eat at a restaurant named Y2K in the year 2044? Especially when you can instead eat in your flying car and have gourmet food dispensed to you through machines.

What? The Jetsons did it. We’re thisclose to living in a Jetson’s existence.

So what are my new year’s resolutions for 2009? Well frankly, I don’t have any. Because resolutions are intended to facilitate life changes in those who dislike aspects of themselves. And Miss Nihilist? She’s well aware of how perfect she is. She doesn’t need to change at all!

In fact, if I were to have a new year’s resolution, it would be to make more people just like Miss Nihilist. Because if more people were like me, the world would be a better place. Seriously. Guaranteed. It’s scientifically proven by one Dr. Nefarious.

And a seal of approval from Dr. Nefarious is a-ok with me!

Anyway, best wishes and sugar plum fairies and other equally cheesy crap for the new year. Try not to choke on a chicken bone and die.

2009 is bound to be a bomb, bitches! We're one year closer to living like Judy and George.