Three Strikes, yer outta there!

Q: I met a man from NY online; though not initially attracted to him physically, he grew on me and we fell in love. We were together for one year and both flew back and forth to each other’s cities, and talked every day. I ended it because of things that bothered me. He was totally surprised and devastated. I realized I’d made a huge mistake, apologized and tried to make up, but he said to “give it time”.

Recently, on his myspace page I found a post from a beautiful woman saying “hey, you have a great weekend.” I’ve been crying constantly since. I miss him terribly. Is it really over?

A: Let me get this straight… despite the fact that he eventually “grew” on you, you still felt a need to point out that you weren’t physically attracted to him when you initially met. Is this one of the reasons why you ended it with him? Because you found that he didn’t grow as much on you as you initially thought? Instead of growing into your partner, you found that he was more like an ugly mold spore?

Secondly, when your ex-boyfriend told you to give him time, you translated it as: please stalk me on myspace?

Lastly, is it really over? I don’t know. That depends on whether you genuinely believe, in your heart of hearts, that wishing someone a great weekend means that they are involved in a relationship. Because if so, then yeah, it’s over. Your grip on reality, however tenuous it used to be. That also means oh shit, Miss Nihilist is a giant slut-taroo. She’s involved with, and being “frisked” by, 6 random people who work in the same building as her, the grocery boy, the mailman, her boss, the receptionist, and the book store clerk. And that’s just today. DAMN, I get around. Look at me go!

I leave you with this parting question: if wishing someone a great weekend translates into being a relationship, what does “being together for one year” mean? Did your NY man accept your myspace friend request, poke you a few times on facebook, and maybe.. oh gods…. Left you a message on your myspace page? Because dude, I think you just got to third base. SCORE!