Say What?

So the following is an excerpt from a blog called Tip or Tat. It is written by a NY waitress who blogs about celebrities who don't tip and those who do, as well as celebrities who are polite (and who aren't) to their servers.

"I promised many servers that I would write this. Today is a quick lesson in tipping. Now, since I was a server, I know I can be a bit of an over tipper. But this is how I've taught even my parents how to tip. Start a 20%. Work up or down based on service. For example, if it was not so good, tip 15%. If it was awful, well you decide. If it was the best service you've ever had, maybe go up to 25%. Just please do not start your guideline at 15%."

Now, forgive me if I am wrong but I was under the impression that tips weren't mandatory. Tips are contingent on good service. But I am supposed to give some waitress/waiter who forgets my drinks, doesn't give me clean utensils, isn't around to serve me at all, or any other mishaps that happen and have happened at restaurants, a 15% tip? And for good service (which is expected in order to be deserving of a tip), 20-25% is the norm? That is 1/4 of your meal. Unless you are rolling in cash, that is a pretty penny. For those prices, you might as well pay for your server to eat your meal. And your server better be at your beck and call for the entire duration of your dinner because unless he/she is attached to your hip during your dinner, the 5 minutes where your server takes your orders, gives your drinks, refills your drinks, gives your meal, and takes your plates, isn't worth paying 125% for your dinner.

The same blogger praises celebrities who leave $40 tips for $24 meals. That isn't good tipping. That is just throwing your money around because you can. There is a difference. I have never been a waitress and perhaps I don't know the first thing about how hard it is to be a waitress. But I am also of the opinion that if you are a terrible waitress, and you can't hack it, you deserve poor tips and probably should be in a new occupation because clearly serving is not your forte. Good waitresses deserve to be tipped well because they give good service. That is the bottom line; you don't deserve a tip simply because you are a waitress. If that was the case, I would tip the grocery boy for handing me my groceries with such flourish.

Waitresses who act like they deserve tips need a huge wake up call. I am not going to give you money simply because you take my order and place the food on my table. I am going to tip you because you are polite and remember my orders, and fulfill any requests I might ask of you. I understand that some restaurants pool their money together and servers have to share their tips with others. But, why should I be expected to give an extra 10% to pay for people who didn't serve me, who never had any impact on the quality of my service? If you have to share your tips, and at the end of the day don't have that much to take home, perhaps you should be looking to work at a different restaurant. One that doesn't rip you off.

The same blogger is of the opinion that if you want to eat out, you should be able to afford all the related costs regardless of how expensive it is. However, I am of the opinion that if you want to eat out at a restaurant, anyone reserves the right to do so. Not just those who can "afford" to give their servers an additional 170% tip (as evidenced by the celebrity who left $40 on a $24 tip and was proclaimed a wonderful tipper).

Servers should understand that tipping is contigent on service. If you give me bad service, I will tip you equally as bad, if at all. I believe that good service should be rewarded on a monetary level, but it is a courtesy to the server who made your restaurant experience "delightful"; it should not be a given expectation, nor should it be a mandatory part of eating out. You give me service, I will give you money. It is a symbiotic relationship, not a one sided dependent one with expectations.